Break Me Down Page 4

  Gibson gritted his teeth. His brother was always doing that, poking that tender spot. “I mean it.”

  “Good. Then go get her, man. If you don’t, I’m driving out there myself. That place is a goddamned death trap.”

  Tessa groaned, but then he heard the sheets shift and a soft thump, like she was falling back onto a pillow in defeat. “I’ll text you the address.”

  “Thank you.”

  “I’d say let me know how she’s doing once you get out there, but I’ve been out that way. The cell reception is shit. So text me when you head back home,” Tessa said.

  “Will do.”

  “And, Gib . . .”

  “Yeah?”

  “If you hurt her, I’m kicking your ass.”

  “And I’ll hold you down while she does it,” Kade added.

  “I’m not going to hurt her.” He leaned against the wall and closed her eyes. She’ll hurt me first.

  If only he could let her.

  Chapter 3

  Sam’s T-shirt clung to her, sweat glazing her back, as she ran the hand sander over the scarred hardwood in her grandmother’s dining room. The steady sound of the machine was usually good for blocking out thoughts and putting her in a state of zen, but for the last two hours her brain had proven to be louder than the obnoxious machine. And the one time she’d attempted to take a break and turn the thing off, the silence had clawed at her like some evil beast. Every creak of the old house, every rustle outside, had made her jump and tense. Which pissed her the fuck off. This was the place where she was most at home, her refuge, and those disgusting shitheads had tainted that, put that creeping fear back in her.

  She gritted her teeth and tried harder to focus, making sure to keep the machine moving so that she wouldn’t get lost in thought and grind her way right through the damn floor. The first signs of dawn were peeking through the tattered curtains, and the wood dust danced in the soft light. Good. At least she’d have light to work by now. The electrical system in the house tripped anytime she plugged in more than one or two things. So the sander and a floor lamp were all she’d allowed herself since she’d gotten here. The shadows had felt oppressive. She needed the light today, needed to stand outside in the wildflower field that flanked the property and feel the sun on her face, chase the chill that had settled into her bones.

  She’d do that. After she completed this room. She needed to finish this to feel like she’d beaten this horrible night, that she’d gotten something accomplished despite it. She shifted forward, her back aching and the kneepads not offering much cushion anymore, to tackle the last section of the floor. She was almost there when the loud hum of the machine cut off with a whine and the lamp blinked out. That thick silence of a power outage blanketed the room, the only sound left was a dripping faucet from kitchen.

  “NO!” She shook the machine. “No, no, no!”

  It felt stupid to yell in the empty house, but she’d been so close to done. So close to claiming that small victory. She sat back on her calves, tugged off one of her gloves, and threw it across the room. It landed with a sad thwap against the shiplap walls. Sweat stung her eyes. She wanted to punch things. To grab a hammer out of the toolbox and just destroy something. But she needed to go flip the circuit breaker. She would finish this floor, goddammit.

  But she didn’t move. Instead, hot tears sliced down her cheeks. She had no idea where they’d come from, hadn’t felt the telltale burn in the back of her throat, but now that they were coming, she couldn’t staunch them. Fat, wet tears rolled down her face and dripped onto the newly stripped floors. Plop. Plop. Plop. Then a full-out sob heaved out of her.

  “Shit.” Any of the strength she had left, any remnants of energy, drained out of her with the salty teardrops. The events of the night and lack of sleep hit her all at once, and she was too exhausted to defend against it. She shoved the sander aside, took off the other glove, and braced her hands on her thighs, the sobs coming in wracking gasps.

  She was going to mess up the floors, but she couldn’t stop. She wasn’t a crier. She hated crying. In her first placement after her grandmother died, she’d had a foster brother who’d teased her because she’d cried every day. He’d point it out to everyone and call her a baby. One day, she’d dipped his toothbrush in the toilet because she’d been tired of taking his shit. She’d gotten caught. That’d been the end of that placement. Not a loss at the time. But she wondered sometimes if she’d stuck that one out, if she would’ve been saved from a lot worse later on.

  But that’s one reason why she’d come here. If she was going to fall apart, she could do it here, alone. Safe and away from prying eyes. No one needed to see her like this. No one would call her a baby or think she was weak or prey on that vulnerability.

  So she let the tears overtake her. Maybe if she exorcised them now, she could move the hell on and forget that she’d almost been raped outside the bar, that she hadn’t been able to protect herself. That she’d failed.

  But right as the heaving sobs started to quiet, the ache in her chest turning hollow and spent, something sounded outside the window. A snap. Like a twig. The noise shouldn’t freak her out. Random critters wandered into this area all the time. Wild rabbits mostly. But her body reacted like it was a major threat, her muscles tensing and her breath stalling. The tears cut off in an instant and all her senses went on alert.

  Whatever the noise had been, it hadn’t set off Mr. Darcy. Sam had put the border collie mix upstairs so he wouldn’t get himself hurt while she worked. But that didn’t mean much. Darcy was a decent watchdog, but he was old and slept hard. She closed her eyes and listened, trying to focus. A soft wind was blowing through the trees and grasses outside, a whispering whir. Birds were starting to greet the dawn. Nothing sinister. Just the lovely, quiet sounds of the country. She sighed and swiped her hands over her face. Calm down, Twitchy. Breathe.

  But before she could complete the breath, a booming knock rocketed through the farmhouse, rattling the door and sending a scream right up her throat. Darcy barked from upstairs. Sam clamped her hands over her mouth just in time to cut off the scream. But she scrambled to her feet and turned toward the front doorway like the Big Bad Wolf was about to bust through.

  Whoever this was, it couldn’t be good. It was too early and this house was too far out for it to be someone selling something. She needed to get to the bedroom and get the gun she kept in there. But the windows in the living room had thin curtains, and she’d have to cross that room to get to the stairs. What if whoever it was saw her?

  Fuck. Her hands shook. There were knives in the kitchen. That’d be something. She took a step that way when the banging came again, each knock a jolt of electric anxiety through her.

  But just as she made it to the doorway of the kitchen, a familiar voice echoed through the house. “Sam, it’s Gib. I know you’re here. Open up.”

  Every tight muscle in her body sagged in relief. Gibson. It was Gibson. Not an ax murderer in a hockey mask. Okay. Okay.

  But then as soon as that thought settled—I’m safe—another one hit. It was Gibson.

  She had no idea how he’d found her, but she’d told him to leave her alone when she’d left the Ranch. And she was a freaking mess right now. If she’d wanted his help, she would’ve asked him for it. That sent a rush of righteous indignation right up her spine, anger hot on its heels.

  Part of her was tempted to ignore his pushy ass. Pretend she wasn’t here. But knowing him, he’d break the damn door down. So instead, she gathered up that anger into a nice, spinning ball in her gut and stalked toward the door.

  He banged on it again before she could reach it, so when she swung the door open, his fist was still hovering in the air. He blinked as if surprised she’d actually appeared, and then blatant relief descended over his features. “Thank Christ.”

  Her jaw clenched, and she had to force it to relax to speak. “What
the hell are you doing here?”

  His gaze skated over her, a deep line appearing between his brows as he ignored her question. “Shit, Sam, you look . . . baby.”

  She had a good idea what she looked like. She was sweaty, covered with wood dust, and between the attack last night and all the crying, her face probably looked like she’d been hit with a wet bag of rocks. Goddammit. This was the last thing she needed Gibson to see. And the fact that he’d forced her into letting him see her like this pissed her off even more. “Don’t you dare call me baby or look at me like that. You’re not supposed to be here. I didn’t invite you.”

  His blue eyes flicked upward, rigid determination there. “You don’t need to be alone right now. And you damn well shouldn’t be alone out here in the middle of nowhere.” He swung a hand toward the door. “A stiff wind would knock this thing down. What are you thinking?”

  Well, that just punched all her bitch buttons. “Thanks for stopping by. It’s been fun. I’m alive and fine. You can go home now. Buh-bye.”

  She moved to shut the door, but his hand flew out to block it from closing. “Oh, no you don’t. You can be pissed at me all you want. But if you think I’m leaving you out here like this, let me alleviate you of that notion. Not gonna happen, sunshine.”

  Her grip on the door tightened. “What? You gonna drag me out kicking and screaming, Gib? I’ll fucking fight you.”

  A muscle in his jaw ticked and he took a step forward. “You know I’m not going to put my hands on you like that. But you either come willingly or you’re going to be staring at my ugly mug until you do.”

  Ugly mug was about as far from the truth as possible. Even with dark shadows under his eyes, his hair disheveled from raking fingers, and a wrinkled shirt, he looked like he’d just fallen off the stage of some hot man revue. But she was too ticked off to care about how hot he was. Mostly.

  “Leave, Gib.”

  “Not unless you come with me.” He ducked under the arm she had braced on the door and strode inside.

  “Oh my God.” She spun around, the door swinging shut on its own behind her. “Boundaries, dude. Ever heard of the word?”

  “Yep. Can spell it and everything.” Gib crossed his arms over his chest and peered around, examining the place. His gaze landed on the sander and the stripped floor of the adjoining dining room. “Is this what you’ve been up to?”

  She groaned. He wasn’t going to go away. That much was clear. And she wasn’t going with him. He really would have to fight her for that. She’d waited too long to take this week off. And she wanted that week spent here. If she could knock out the list of projects she had, she’d be that much closer to having this place livable. “I’m renovating. Despite what ideas you have in that testosteroned brain of yours, I didn’t run out here because I’m freaking out over what happened last night. I had a vacation planned. I’m going to spend the week here—alone. I just left a few hours early. And I’m fine. I come out here all the time. I have a gun. I have Darcy. No serial killers have bothered me yet.”

  “Yet. There’s a key word for ya. Friday the 13th Part Thirty-Five could be set here.”

  “Gib.”

  “Look, I get that you don’t want me here. But you’re not going to convince me everything’s peachy. Your argument would hold more water if it weren’t obvious that you’ve been crying, that you haven’t slept, and that you were completely freaked out when you bolted at the Ranch.”

  She gritted her teeth, hoping her steely gaze would make him back the hell off. “I’m. Fine.”

  But instead of backing off, he stepped closer, his eyes softening and his hands cupping her shoulders. “I don’t think you are. And that’s cool. Feel whatever you need to feel. You don’t have to hide that from me or be embarrassed. But I need you to forget for a second that you’re mad at me. Forget all that shit at the Ranch. And remember that before anything else, I’m your friend, Sam. And if this were my brother or Pike or Foster acting like a hardheaded, reckless jackass, I would call them out, too. Would you let Tessa do this? Stay out here alone when she’d just been through something fucking traumatic?”

  His palms on her shoulders were almost too much. She’d die if he could feel her trembling. But the touch was somehow grounding, too—settling. And she hated to admit he was right. She’d never let Tessa do this. She could come up with ten arguments for why it was a dumb idea. But she couldn’t leave. If she left, her attackers won. They would successfully steal her vacation, change her plans, alter her life. She met Gibson’s gaze, needing him to understand, needing him to hear her. She put her hands over his. “I can’t go, Gib. I won’t. I get what you’re saying, but . . . I need this. Maybe more than anything. I need to be here.”

  She hated the pleading tone in her voice, had never wanted Gibson to see this side of her. Even if he hadn’t wanted to go down that road with her, in her mind, she was still the domme and he the sub. She was supposed to be strong in front of him. Instead, she felt like she could crumple at any minute. Everything raw and exposed. Sleep deprivation and the adrenaline crash unraveling the strings holding her up.

  Gibson’s eyes searched hers, the lines around his mouth deepening. “You’re not going to change your mind on this, are you?”

  She shook her head. “I can’t.”

  He let out a long sigh and lowered his hands to his sides. “Okay, then.”

  “Really?” All the air sagged out of her. Thank God. Thank. God. He was going to leave her be. She could wallow in peace. Put herself back together on her own before having to face the world again. “Thank you.”

  “Right.” Gibson gave a stiff nod, turned on his heel, and headed to the door.

  Sam blinked, surprised at how quickly he was leaving. She’d expected a safety lecture first or something, but he opened the door and stepped outside. When the door clicked shut, unexpected loss swept through her, like the candle inside her had snuffed out. She stood there for a few long seconds, staring at the shut door, but then she quickly snapped out of the weird reaction and strode toward it. She should at least tell him good-bye.

  But when she opened the door, instead of seeing Gibson’s back, a large, bounding dog was headed straight for her. She only had time to put her hands up in front of her before Sasha, Gibson’s golden lab, was tackling her with happy barks and sloppy licks. Sam skidded back on her heels, barely avoiding sprawling right onto her ass.

  “Sash!” Gibson called from the dirt driveway. “Down!”

  Sasha got off of Sam and went back to all fours but did a happy, spinning dance, slapping Sam’s legs with her tail.

  Gib jogged up and grabbed Sasha’s collar, guiding her into a sit. “Sorry. Being cooped up in the car that long makes her . . . well, insane.”

  Sam was still stunned by the appearance of the dog when she noticed the black duffel bag slung over Gibson’s shoulder. Her gaze zeroed in on it. “What is that? And why is your dog with you?”

  Gibson shrugged and then gave one of those pirate grins, all dimples and scruff and bad boy next door. “I had a feeling you weren’t going to come with me. So I made sure I had a plan B.”

  Her stomach dropped. “Plan B?”

  “Yep. Good to always have one in business and in life.” He stepped past her, back into the house, taking Sasha with him. “Congratulations, you have your first houseguest. Two if you count Sash.”

  Every one of Sam’s feathers fluffed up. “Oh, the hell I do. Guest would imply that you were invited, which you’re not. There’s only one functioning bedroom in this place.”

  Something flickered in his eyes at that, but it quickly disappeared. “I have a sleeping bag in the trunk. I can take a couch or the floor. And Sasha will behave. She can hang out in the backyard if need be. It’s this or you come home. Not negotiable, sunshine.”

  “I’m not going . . .” She barely resisted the impulse to stomp her foot. Instead, s
he smacked him on the arm—hard. Then when that felt good, she did it again. Then she pushed him. “Goddammit, Gib. You can’t—”

  All the rage from the night before was bubbling up and out. He was backing her into a corner and she didn’t fucking like it. She was spent and exhausted and emotionally wrung out and she wanted to hit things. Hit him. She pushed again, and he rocked back a step, staying silent and stoic, even with Sasha barking at the ruckus.

  “What is wrong with you? You can’t do this.” Angry words spilled out of her with every shove. Words that didn’t make sense. Words that weren’t even directed at him. But he said nothing. Soon he was up against the wall and she was pummeling the sides of her fists against his chest like some crazed thing.

  He didn’t resist, just let her push and hit. Absorbed her violence. She couldn’t look at him, couldn’t stop. She saw blurred colors and realized she was crying again. Sobbing and yelling. Jesus.

  “Fuck. Fuck!” Her voice raked over her raw throat.

  “Baby,” he said, almost too softly to hear above her own tirade and Sasha’s confused barking. “It’s okay. Just let that shit out. Whatever you need to do.”

  She shook her head. She couldn’t. She just couldn’t deal with this right now. With him. She gave another halfhearted push. But when she finally ran out of steam, almost collapsing into his chest from the exhaustion, she looked up at him.

  And that did her in. The expression on his face was so heartbreakingly tender she couldn’t bear it. He’d let her beat him to a pulp if she wanted. She knew it. Saw it there. Her head spun. Crazy woman, meet immovable force. She closed her eyes, the floor feeling as if it were tilting beneath her feet. Was she still crying? Yeah, she was. She couldn’t even feel it anymore. Her chest heaved with broken breaths.

  Gibson’s arms were around her before she could topple over. “Shh, it’s okay. I’ve got you. Just take a slow breath. It’s all right. You’re tired. Your body’s giving out on you.”