What If You & Me Page 20

  But the idea burned up in a flash of heat as soon as Hill’s other hand tracked to the top edge of her panties. Oh, God. Before she had time to contemplate the gravity of what was happening, Hill had broken away from their kiss and was dragging the lacy fabric downward. She could stop him. She knew she could. But she found herself complying instead. She slipped off her sandals, a tremor working through her, and he pulled her panties down and off, tossing them to the side. Her gaze zeroed in on the little puddle of lacy fabric that was now five feet away.

  Cool air drifted over her heated skin as Hill traced his hand upward from the soft part of her knee and along her inner thigh. Her body prickled with awareness and anticipation, a sheen of sweat dampening her skin. Hill kept his attention on her face when he moved his hand higher and higher and then finally brushed his fingers over the tender skin of her labia. A full-body shudder of need went through her, and she sucked in a deep breath.

  He watched her like she was the most interesting movie ever made, desire flaring in his eyes as he stroked her and found her slick and needy from his touch. He groaned under his breath, the strained sound sending pleasure through Andi, and he eased his finger inside her, thick and callused and hot.

  She gasped, the delicious friction making her feet arch with an electric sensation that shot down her legs. Her body clamped around him like a fist.

  “God, you feel so good, Andi,” he said, his voice full of grit as he guided another finger inside her, stretching her a little and providing a toe-curling fullness. “So fucking sexy.”

  She reached out blindly, gripping his wide shoulders to keep her balance. She suddenly worried her knees wouldn’t make it through this.

  Hill leaned down and kissed her again, his fingers pumping slowly inside her in a rhythm that had her hips rocking along with it. His tongue stroked against hers in the same pattern, slow, deep, taking his time. He tasted like the sweet, spicy dinner they’d had and a whole lot of promise. She couldn’t get enough. The fear that had haunted her earlier had been chased into the shadows by Hill’s touch. All she could think about now was how amazing he was making her feel, how much she wanted all of him stretched out over her, pushing inside her, skin to skin, the full experience.

  The scent of her own arousal drifted around them, and she moaned softly into his kiss, his fingers like magic. He broke away from her mouth, his eyes hooded, and then just when she thought he was going to come back for another kiss, he lowered himself to his knees, his fingers still working her.

  “Hill,” she whispered, not sure what she was telling or asking him.

  He looked up at her, face half-lit in the lamplight, and with his free hand gathered the fabric of her dress in his hand. “Hold up your dress, gorgeous. I want to see what this is doing to you.”

  Oh. God.

  She took the skirt of her dress in her hand and watched as he braced himself on the knee of his uninjured leg. Then he was gazing right at the place where he was touching her, his breath tickling her sensitive skin. He circled his thumb on her clit, his fingers still inside her, and she thought she was going to lose it right there, but then he shifted forward, moved his thumb away, and put his mouth on her.

  Some unintelligible sound slipped from her throat at the feel of his hot tongue and soft lips. Her body lit on fire with a new cascade of sensations. His beard brushing against her tender skin. The ends of his hair tickling her thighs. She tried to process it all, wanting to remember every moment, but then his tongue circled her clit and he rocked his fingers into her, obliterating all chance of organizing her thoughts. Pleasure shot through her veins like a drug, her nails digging into his shoulders and her head tipping back against the door, rattling it. She worried she might scale the damn thing like Spider-Man. Because somehow it was too much sensation to manage all at once. Her body didn’t know how to deal with it. This was so much different than her own hand or her vibrator.

  But before she realized what she was doing, she’d draped her leg over his shoulder, silently begging for more. Too much, yet she still wanted more.

  “Fuck, Andi,” Hill said after a few minutes of using his tongue to drive her wild, his panting breaths a cool caress against her overheated skin. “I could spend all night right here, hearing those needy sounds you’re making. I know you’re on the edge of coming, but I’m enjoying this too much to rush.” He kissed her inner thigh. “You taste so fucking good.”

  She groaned, and she could almost feel him grinning at the torture he was meting out. “Hill…”

  “Yes?” He dragged his tongue along her crease, making her fingers ball into a fist.

  “Please.”

  “Tell me what you want,” he said, slowly pumping his fingers inside her.

  “I need to come,” she gasped, barely resisting the urge to grab his hair and guide his mouth back to the place she needed it.

  She waited, expecting him to give her the orgasm now that she’d asked, but instead, he slipped his fingers out, guided her leg off his shoulder, and stood. “I know you do.”

  Her lips parted, his movements not making sense in her brain. “What are you doing?”

  Hill gave her a roguish smirk and brushed his thumb over her bottom lip, letting her taste herself. “You’re going to get what you want…eventually. But after an orgasm is when the fear rushed in last time. So this time, we’re not going to let the fear get its way.” He slipped his arms around her, letting her dress fall back into place, and pulled her against him. His erection pressed against her belly, hard and thick.

  “Wanting to come has a way of blocking out almost all other thoughts. That’s why sex gets so many people into trouble.” He slid his hand down to her ass, gripping her gently. “I want you so out of your mind with need that nothing else has room. No space for overthinking or worrying. So all you’re thinking about is pleasure and fun and feeling good. Then, when I fuck you,” he said with utter masculine confidence, “it will be because you begged me to, not because you’re trying to white-knuckle your way through fear.”

  Her heartbeat was pounding in her chest and between her legs, but the words were weaving through her with erotic promise. As much as she wanted relief from the tension he’d built within her, what he was suggesting sounded way better. Sex without fear. Sex with a quiet mind. Sex with Hill.

  “Sounds tortuous,” she said.

  “It does, doesn’t it?” His smile was playfully wicked. “You game?”

  She laughed and slid her hands up his chest, finding that his heart was beating quickly, too. Only then did she remember that it’d been years for him. She wasn’t the only one dealing with demons and an empty bed. “I’m game under one condition.”

  He cocked his head. “And what’s that?”

  She slid her hand down and pressed her palm against the hard length in his pants. Her inner muscles clenched at the thought that he might be inside her sometime soon, filling her, making her feel good. “I get to torture you back.”

  Desire sparked in his eyes, and his cock flexed against her palm. “Game on, neighbor.”

  “Game on.” She rubbed her hand along his erection, loving the groan he made, and she kissed him. “Show me your bedroom, Hill.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  Hill wanted to pick up Andi and carry her into the bedroom like he was saving her from a fire, toss her onto the bed, strip her naked, and get back to making her gasp. But before he gave in to the instinct, he stopped himself. Even though he’d worked hard to keep his upper body strong, he couldn’t trust his balance to carry another person with his prosthesis yet. Dropping Andi on the way to the bedroom would be quite the buzzkill.

  He could just imagine explaining to Ramsey how he’d ended up putting his date in the emergency room. That metaphor would be way too appropriate for the state of his sex life. So instead, he grabbed Andi’s hand and led her to his bedroom.

  He switched on the ov
erhead light by habit, but when the harsh light filled the room, his stomach clenched. He wanted to see all of Andi in full technicolor detail, but if things went well, he’d be getting naked, too. Even though Andi had assured him that she was attracted to him and his disability wasn’t an issue, anxiety and self-consciousness still crept up his spine. There was a reason Christina hadn’t slept with him after his accident, a reason she’d found someone else to go to bed with, and he couldn’t help but think the amputation had a lot to do with it. It was an unavoidable visual reminder that he wasn’t the same man he used to be.

  Andi hadn’t known him before, but he didn’t want the spotlight on his disability. He didn’t want her thinking about anything but her own pleasure. Unfortunately, as he glanced around, all he saw were reminders of how he was different. His room was neat, but he hadn’t put certain things away. Like the crutches he kept by the bedside to use if he had to get up in the middle of the night. Or his running prosthesis, which was lying on the dresser. At least the wheelchair he sometimes used around the house when his muscles were aching was tucked away in the closet. Even so, he wished he could steer Andi back out and take a minute to put some things away.

  “Wow,” Andi said, oblivious to the internal crisis he was having. “This is how clean you keep your room when you’re not expecting company? I thought boys’ rooms were supposed to be messy. Where are the half-empty beer cans and dirty underwear? The big bottle of lube? I feel cheated.”

  Andi’s comment broke him out of his circling thoughts, startling him into a laugh. “The big bottle of lube?”

  She looked over at him, amusement in her eyes, and he realized what she was doing. Somehow she’d sensed his discomfort over her seeing his personal space and was trying to distract him. This woman.

  “I’m not an animal,” he said with a playfully affronted tone. “I keep the lube put away in a drawer like a gentleman.”

  She laughed. “Well, aren’t you fancy.”

  He walked over to the side of the bed and turned on the lamp before coming back and flipping off the overhead light. The softened lighting took the edge off some of his nerves and made Andi’s fair skin look like porcelain. He wanted to lick every bit of it.

  He took her hand in his, trying to gauge how she was doing, and kissed the inside of her wrist. Her pulse jumped against his lips. When she’d told him her story in the WorkAround kitchen, he’d wanted to personally castrate the sick fuck who had used her and hurt her so badly. But he knew he couldn’t undo what she’d been through. All he could do was show her how different sex could be with someone she could trust. She’d told him it would be easier if he took control, was assertive instead of sweet, which he was one hundred percent down for. He’d always liked being bossy in bed, but he didn’t want to push her further than she wanted to go.

  “Still with me?” he asked, keeping his voice low.

  Andi’s gaze held his, her pupils dark in the low light, and she wet her lips. “Totally with you. Truly.”

  Something tight unlocked in his shoulders at her assurance, and he leaned down to kiss her. She relaxed into the kiss, her hands splaying against his chest, and he took the opportunity to reach around her and unzip her dress. The sound of the zipper was loud in the quiet room, but it only made his cock harder. It was the sound of Andi’s trust.

  When he pulled back from the kiss, he reached out and slipped her dress off her shoulders and down her arms. The light cotton fell into a cloud around her feet, leaving Andi standing there in his bedroom in a pale-pink lacy bra and nothing else.

  His breath left him in a rush as he took in the sight of her. “Fuck, you’re beautiful.”

  “Back at ya, neighbor.” Andi’s lips curved a little, and she reached back to unhook her bra. She let it fall away.

  Her small, pert breasts made Hill’s tongue press to the roof of his mouth. He lifted his hand to cup her breast, running his thumb over her dusky nipple and loving the way she shivered at his touch.

  “My turn,” she said, her fingers taking hold of the bottom edge of his T-shirt.

  He lifted his arms and let her pull off his shirt. Cool air touched his overheated skin, and he watched her expression change as she took in the view. One of the things he liked so much about Andi was that she didn’t play it cool. She didn’t employ a poker face. She wore her feelings proudly, and right now, that look said she wanted him. That look made him forget to be self-conscious about the scars on his chest.

  “I’ve had dirty dreams about you that started like this.” Andi tossed his T-shirt onto the floor and stepped fully into his space. “Ever since you opened your door that day without your shirt on.”

  Her breasts pressed against his bare skin, and the feel of that silky feminine softness nearly did him in. He cupped her ass, fitting her against his erection. “Yeah? What happens next?”

  Her fingers found the waistband of his jeans, making a little space between their bodies, and she unfastened the button. The zipper came down next and she tucked her hand inside his boxer briefs, the velvet touch of her hand wrapping around his cock making him shudder with need.

  “You take off the rest of these clothes and show me how to make you feel good,” she said, sounding a little breathless. “You got to taste me. Seems only fair I get afforded the same opportunity.”

  Show me. Taste me. He closed his eyes, a roll of hell yes moving through him. When he opened his eyes again, she was watching him, waiting. Part of him wanted to be the nice guy, tell her she didn’t need to do anything for him, having her in his bed was enough. But the way Andi was looking at him told him what he needed to know. She wouldn’t be asking if she didn’t want to try it. She wasn’t offering this as a favor. She said she wanted to torture him back. He wasn’t going to stop her.

  He slipped her hand out of his pants and walked backward toward the foot of the bed. “I can do that.”

  He sat on the edge and pulled off his shoes and socks. When he shifted to take off his jeans, it took an inner pep talk before he could go for it. But after a few seconds of mental gymnastics, he bit the bullet and pulled his jeans and underwear down his thighs and off, exposing the insistent state of his cock but also revealing his residual limb and prosthesis.

  He looked up, bracing himself for Andi’s reaction. Her gaze tracked over him, gliding along his abdomen, lingering on his erection, and then continuing downward where his lower leg transitioned from flesh to mechanical device. Her attention glided back up to his face, her eyes unreadable, and she lowered herself to her knees. She braced her hands on his thighs and leaned in to kiss him. The kiss was long and deep, and he lost himself in it for a moment, his hand going to the back of her neck.

  When she pulled back, she met his gaze. “I know this is hard for you, but you’re luscious. Every bit of you. I would pin your photo on my wall and draw hearts on it.”

  He glanced away. “Andi, you don’t need to—”

  “No, I want you to really hear me.” She slid her fingertips over the scars on his abdomen, tracing the raised skin there. “When I look at you, I see strength and bravery.” Her hand tracked lower, wrapping around his cock and making him forget everything else for a second. “I see a man.” Her hand moved down to his thigh, making its way over the sock that protected his limb below his knee to where his prosthesis connected. “I see a superhero who risked his own life to help others. Who literally gave up part of his body for it.” She braced her hands back on his thighs. “And I think you’re sexy as fuck.”

  He released a breath and cupped her face. “Thank you.”

  Her mouth tipped up at one corner. “You may want to hold that thanks for later. I’m about to do more than compliment you.” She glanced down pointedly and then back up to him, heat in her eyes. “Show me what you like.”

  His stomach muscles flexed in anticipation as Andi lowered her head, hovering above his cock. He didn’t want to blink, afraid t
o miss one second of this beautiful woman giving him pleasure. “It’s hard to mess this up. Touch me wherever you want,” he said, his voice a croak in his throat. “While you use your mouth. Don’t do anything you’re not into.”

  She gripped the base of his cock with her hand, her breath hot on the damp head, and smiled. “That, I can guarantee you.”

  The words were exactly what he needed to hear. He got off knowing his partner was enjoying herself, that she wanted to be doing what she was doing because it gave her pleasure, too. He damn sure had enjoyed going down on her.

  Hill watched as Andi’s lips closed over the head of his cock, the warmth of her mouth and tongue nearly making him cry out. It’d been so long. So. Long. Since a woman had touched him like this, tasted him, and the fact that it was Andi made it all the more intense. Her trust in him was the ultimate aphrodisiac. He threaded his hands in her hair, the soft red strands cascading over his knuckles, and he watched her.

  She was taking her time, sucking him slowly, using the tip of her tongue to tease the crown, driving him out of his mind, and just when he’d get on the edge of orgasm and his grip on her hair would tighten, she’d back off. She pulled away briefly, sending him a wicked look, and then she dipped down and ran her tongue along his balls.

  “Fuck,” he groaned, his belly dipping as he tried to maintain control. “I’m not sure you needed instruction. You’re going to kill me.”

  She laughed softly and peeked up at him. “I don’t have a lot of experience with this, but I read a lot of dirty books. A single girl can’t survive by vibrator alone.”